i'll be there for you?

Lately, I've felt really abandonned by a lot of the people I care about. Some may know this, others may not, but two days ago I had to rush myself into the hospital because I had severe abdominal pains. I'm not talking like "oh, a cramp, it'll pass" kind of pains - I'm saying full blown, you cannot sit down, you have to lie in the starfish position on your living room floor while pressing a heating pad firmly to your stomach kind of pains. I was nausaeous, couldn't eat, and drowsy for about 3 hours before I took myself in. The doctors tested me for everything under the sun: thinking I was pregnant, or that I had an STI/STD, that I had hunger pains and was anorexic, but finally they decided that my appendix must be on the point of bursting. Thanks?
Ever since then, with the exception of going to see No Doubt, I've been at home, sitting on the couch with a warming bean bag on my lap. It's the only way I can be without wanting to kill myself. Granted, the pain isn't as bad as it was before - meaning I don't feel like I'm being continuously stabbed in the gut, but the pain does get to that point sometimes.
Since I've been like this, 2 people have come to see me/made any real effort to contact me. Lily was over for a bit, and Marija came over before and after the show, but really, thats it. Some other people have asked me if I wanted to hang out, but when I told them I couldn't really go anywhere or do anything, I was considered a lost cause and forgotten about. I get that everyones doing the Folk Fest right now, but it's nice to have even the slightest bit of recognition when something shitty happens. A phone call, maybe? at least.
I'm bored everyday now to the point of tears. My own brother left me to go hang out with other people, not even half an hour after I was discharged from the ER. There are only so many movies, hours spent on facebook, and updates in my various blogs that I can handle before I start to go crazy. Normally at that point, I would remove myself from my house and find something to do. but i can't. I'm stuck.

This sentiment leads to something else I've felt for a very long time. Two years at least, I think. It's really hard for me to say, but I think it's somewhat necessary. When I was in grade 10, my brother came down with some kind of unknown sickness. He missed 4+ months of school, and the doctors never found out what was wrong with him. He went partially blind, and couldn't walk, read, or write. At that time, my Mum was really sick too, because she'd just had another surgery, and I had to take care of her. I spent nearly everyday at home doing whatever I could for the family, and eventually, I began to resent my health.
If I was sick too, we could all be miserable together, and I'd have some kind of closeness with someone else, instead of being the outsider that I was. Ever since then, I've wanted to come down with some kind of sickness, just so that I could get the attention that I feel I deserve. It's not really ever been a conscious thought, but just something that I would occasionally wonder about.
"If the doctors didn't know what was wrong with me, or I had to have surgery, what kind of reaction would the people around me have?"
Turns out, there wouldn't be a reaction. People would just forget, and not care, because its summer and there are better things going on.
I'm absolutely crushed.
I know that deep down, I appreciate being healthy, and not having any permanent problems - but being in a bad state does draw attention to you, and show you who really does care. Right now, I've got two people. It's a shocking realization I hoped I wouldn't come to so quickly after graduating, but I guess I have.

I don't know how I feel.